My Very Own Kirstie Related Rant

Right this Kirstie debate has got me all riled up for many reasons:

-She is only suggesting an alternative, therefore opening the possibility of there being more choices for women, not less.

-She makes a very valid point about fertility, which I myself always try to make all my female friends aware of.

-A lot of what she's said has been taken completely out of context.

-But I'm mainly annoyed because of the many many reactions I've seen that state- "having babies should not be the only thing that women aim for in life"

Err I'm sorry, she's not even saying that, but now you mention it- why on earth not?

Having babies is the only thing I've ever wanted to do- what is so wrong with that??

I went to uni, studied Early Years Education (Not for career reasons but to make me better equipped as a Mother- if they'd offered a parenting degree course I would have jumped at it!), thankfully I met my husband young, married at 24, and had Boo shortly before my 26th birthday. And I'm thrilled with my life!   

DaddyBear goes to work out of necessity. He does not love and adore accounting- who does? His dream when he was younger was not to count and check company figures. He would much rather be at home with me and Boo.

When people get old or are faced with illness and death, they don't surround themselves with their work, but with their family.

Doesn't everyone agree that when it comes down to it- all that really matters in life is love and family???

So why oh why do people still find it necessary to belittle the idea of 'just wanting babies'? 

I'm not saying everyone should have children (though I admit I can't quite understand why you wouldn't want them)  I am completely pro-choice. 

If a person wants to have children and stay home with them- great.

If a person wants to have children and to go to work- great.

If a person doesn't want children and just wants to work- great.

But you cannot say that a career is the best thing to spend your life on, because it simply isn't. Unless you are out there changing the world, curing disease, or saving lives then you are just filling time before you die.

My husband's job is stressful and busy. But it is not important. If he didn't do his job no one would die, nothing dramatic would happen. And this is pretty much true of everyone I know's jobs.

Really it's all just a load of bullshit created to stop ourselves getting bored and killing each other.

Maybe once I've had another baby and my kids are of school age I'll start to try my hand at other things that I may want to do as a career.

But at the moment I can't see that far ahead and actually the only thing I can imagine doing, other than caring for my husband and children (gosh, slap on the wrist for being so archaic!) is perhaps being a surrogate for my cousin.

When I was living out my dream of being pregnant with Boo, my poor cousin, who is only one year older than me, was battling cervical cancer, which resulted in a hysterectomy. She cannot ever carry her own children. She has had eggs frozen but the likelihood of them being viable is slim- she may well never have her own biological child. 

Before that happened children weren't really on her radar, since it has happened they are all she can think about.

If I could use my body to carry a child for her (either using her egg or an egg donor's egg) and give her the gift of being a Mother, of having her own family, then that would mean far more to me than any poxy career.

When my hubs is old and grey and he's reminiscing about his life, he is not going to be thinking about crunching numbers at his work, he is going to be thinking about me and Boo and the life we have made together.

When I am old and grey I am not going to be mourning a lost career that I never really wanted. I am going to be thinking about the family I created with DaddyBear, and hopefully the one I had my part in in my cousin's.

Family is what matters, the rest is just a filler.

"Don't get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life"

Thanks for reading- sorry so ranty!

MummyBear X